What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
