i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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