roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
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