Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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