I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize