is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.