so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
you didnt know i had herpes?
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.