Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize