Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
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I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
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The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
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