But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Randomize
