She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Swine flu is the new snow day.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
