jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Randomize
