i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Randomize
