i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
