I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Are these your boobs on my camera?
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
