I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"