Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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