Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
