I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
