I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
