just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing