he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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