i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
