I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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