OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
