Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
