Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Never underestimate the power of titties
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize