So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
