Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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