we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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