How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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