Do vagina's smell?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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