What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
COCAINE IS GR8
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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