hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i would punch a child for taco bell
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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