At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
