all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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