It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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