just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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