it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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