it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
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She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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