Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
