Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize