windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
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