Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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