Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
