A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
