I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
