quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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