you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
