Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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