I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize